I Want My Husband to Grow With Me
Dear Jesse and Melva,
I have been reading your “Be Attitudes” on social media for the past several weeks. Although I have not joined your private Facebook group (something I plan to do in the near future), I am curious about how to encourage my spouse to join me in implementing the daily inspiration.
We have been married for about 17 years and things between us tend to be mostly routine. I am feeling that, instead of us continuing to grow together, we are becoming more stagnant day by day. You see, I am so eager for the two of us to enjoy our lives together more; and, he seems to hang on things the way they are. He says we’re fine and he’s happy. According to him, there is nothing to change.
I’d love to have your advice.
Wanting More in Kansas City, MO
Dear Wanting More,
Thank you for your question. You are not alone. We often hear from spouses where one partner is more interested in their spiritual and personal growth and development than the other.
There’s "good" and "bad" news about spouses who are in the same situation as you.
We’ll give you the "bad" news first. That is, that fact that your husband loves you and is happy the way things are. You cannot change him. It’s okay to invite and encourage him, but the decision is his to make. So far, his decision is to keep your current routine because it seems to work for him.
Now for the good news.
There are three things you can do:
#1. Monitor your feelings and validate them. Honor your disappointment and let that be ok and have peace with them.
#2. Monitor your thoughts. Are you more focused on your spouse not joining you in practicing the “Be Attitudes” or are you accepting that although it’s ok that he’s made his decision, which is not right or wrong; good or bad – it is honestly where he is? Focus on your interest and decide that not only will you implement and enjoy the “Be Attitudes” for yourself, you will enjoy them
#3. Take action by following through on implementing the ideas and notice how you feel when you try them on – so to speak.
Each “Be Attitude” represents the characteristics of people who are successful in love, marriage, and life. They are designed to support participants to discover and awaken dormant qualities within that have been there all the time out of most people’s awareness.
We are sure you have heard many in the spiritual and personal development community encourage “Becoming more of your Best Self”. These “Be Attitudes” support this idea.
Focus on what you can do for you and journal your experiences, feelings, and thoughts as you move forward. Don’t concentrate on being perfect. Notice how you feel. Sometimes times you will feel more successful than others with each “Be Attitude” That’s ok too.
The reality is with each “Be Attitude” a seed is planted in your subconscious. You are being proactive for you, and everyone around you will benefit from experiencing a more expanded you.
In the meantime, we invite you to join our FREE private Facebook group for more tips to support you.
To your relationship success,
Jesse and Melva
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