Ask Jesse and Melva – January 7, 2020

Dear Jesse and Melva,

Here we are, entering another new year. The whole idea about making resolutions is something I enjoy doing, but for some reason, like many others, I break my promise to myself before Valentine’s Day. I want this year to be different because I know how important goal setting is, but I lose steam for accomplishing my goals way too soon.

Frustrated with Goal Setting in Scottsdale, Arizona

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Dear Frustrated in Scottsdale, Arizona,

We thought about your question and ran across this quote from Dennis Waitley:

We have noticed that many people focus on goal setting for weight loss, quitting smoking, getting organized, saving money, spending more time with loved ones, etc.

Since we focus on success in love, marriage and life, we recommend that you consider adding at least one goal for your relationship on your list, because we believe that many people have at least one important relationship that you’d like to improve or take to the next level.

But if you’re like most of us, there are likely areas that need improvement.

And if you have had an experience with your mate that has been problematic for you this past year, there are positive steps you can take to support you to have inner peace - even if your mate doesn’t respond positively. You’ll feel better because you did your best to contribute to healing the rift

As we write this response to you, we both realize that we’re getting a little ahead of ourselves. This is because goal setting is a second step to making New Year’s Resolutions stick.
Having a clear vision for what you want to experience in love marriage and life is the first step.

Why?

Because a vision provides reasons for why you want to have the results described in those New Year Resolutions. This will keep you focused on the success you desired. It is has been said:

“What you focus on expands.” ~Arnold Patent

“What you focus on the longest becomes the strongest.” ~Les Brown

That focus provides the context and internal environment for creating a solid foundation within for goal setting and shapes and guides decision making and action steps to get the results you want.

The focus also supports staying on track through the inevitable ups and downs of daily live.

To take this crucial first step, we invite you, “Frustrated in Scottsdale Arizona” as well as those of you who are reading this column to join us for our “5-Day Vision Challenge, which will be coming up soon.

Let us know how it goes.  Please keep us updated.  We’d love to hear how this works out for you.

To your relationship success,

Jesse and Melva

PS. Stay tuned for our “Holiday Survival Guide for Couples”!